It's the Little Things

It’s been said that it’s the little things that make life worth living. Has there ever been a truer statement? What makes you smile more than the great little unexpected moments that life throws at you? We’ve all been here before and the following is a list of a few of the little things that make us happiest.

Finding money in Your Pocket: It’s been months since you’ve put on that winter coat. You reach into the pockets and what do you find? 20 bucks! Is there anything better than this? Even though you lost the money you put in your pocket some time ago, it feels like you actually MADE money when you find it again. It’s such a great feeling that you think it would be awesome to simply put money in your pockets just so you find it later. But that would not be the same.

Turning to the right page in a book on the 1st try: This was something we have all done once. Okay, well if you’ve never done your work or ever read anything, you’ve never felt this feeling before. Otherwise, for the rest of us how good was this, especially in a textbook or something. In class your teacher would say, “turn to page 238,” and then BAM, page 238 there you are. You know for 8 seconds afterward you thought you were capable of seeing into the future or something superhuman. This feeling would come to a screeching halt when you would get cocky and try it again only to be letdown that you turned to page 209.

Two candy bars fall from vending machine: In general when you go to a vending machine, it’s because you’re starving and the only thing available is the 85¢ non-named brand beef jerky or the little sleeve of trail mix. Making the decision of what to get at a vending machine is always a tough one, it inevitably comes down to 2 choices and you waiver. Finally you make the call, confident and excited you press F-4 and watch the little corkscrew turn and the skittles fall down to the bottom, but wait, the corkscrew is still turning. What’s this? Two skittles? In the words of Boston, Oh, What a Feeling! You just hit the two for one special! In reality, you only saved 50 cents, but it feels like someone just handed you a million bucks.

The Perfect Pour: When you’re pouring soda or a likewise carbonated beverage into a cup you're bound to do two things, fill the cup only to find out that its really only half full (or half empty depending on your outlook on life) or fill too much and it over flows. But there are those times when you pour and the drink fizzes and it nears the top of the cup and it looks like it's about to over flow, then like magic, the fizz is over the top of the cup but it stays self contained and calms back into the cup. Congratulations friend you’ve just scored, “The Perfect Pour.”

The Perfect Gus Pump: Ideally, the perfect gas pump is a free one. But about 99.9% of the time, we all go for the .00 on the gas fill up. If you’re like us, you use the credit card to fill the tank and when you get your statement, it reads: 45.00 38.00 40.00, etc. good work friend, you’ve had a solid month.
Now when it comes to the ".00" most of the time it's accomplished in overtime, that is, when the pump handle drops and says, "no, that’s quite enough sir." That’s when you say, “I don’t care what these signs say about overfilling, I’m getting the price from $39.12 to 40.00.” Inevitably you press that handle around 15 times as you push that bad boy to the limit.

That's a forced .00, and while getting to that point is nice, getting there on one squeeze? That’s euphoric. If you get 42.00 flat by just releasing the handle perfectly on the dot, that is called a game-changer right there. You could have been dumped, fired, and lost your pants in a tragic pant-eating accident, but hitting that double-zero is just so sweet that for 5 minutes all is okay.

Avoiding all red lights on the way to somewhere: This never happens when you are running late. It’s almost like the road Gods* are rewarding you for not rushing and doing potentially dangerous things in order to get somewhere on time.
You never attempt to hit all the lights, it just sort of starts. You start out on your drive and realize that you are on a little streak, you hit 3, then 4 then 8 green lights in a row, you are unstoppable, and the road is yours.

*Major Road Gods:
Trafficthopoles- God of all traffic
Ceralightis – God of lights
Asphaultia – God of all gravel and roads
Curio – God of “rubber neckers” and the “curiosity factor”

Knocking something over and catching it before it hits: This little thing is so great because its combines the greatness of making a nice snag with the relief of avoiding something that is potentially disastrous.

Situation: You’re walking alongside the kitchen counter and your elbow knocks a glass, so naturally you throw your hand back there and you grab it. If you were consciously trying to catch it, chances are that glass would be in a million pieces on the floor, but there is something about the subconscious that makes you smooth as silk. Your subconscious takes over and ‘sniggity-snag’ you grab that cup like Randy Moss over 3 defenders. What makes this even better is if someone is watching. If a baseball fan is watching, you’re getting tagged with “damn, that’s totally going to make web gems tonight.”

Getting too much change back: Life isn’t cheap, that much is true. But sometimes things get a little cheaper when you unexpectedly are given a 5-spot and four more 1’s when you should have got five bucks back, instead you made back an extra four, unbeknownst to the teller. It's like a little golden ticket slipped its way into their hands. And, like Charlie Bucket, you come screaming out of the store thinking you’ve just won a huge prize. Amazing right? In a world where The Man is always trying to get you, there’s nothing better than when you get the best of The Man.

When the cashier forgets to scan something at the register: Okay, admit it, you’ve gotten away with a few “accidental” item-under-the-cart transfers. No room for that 24-pack in the carriage? Slide it underneath and if the cashier happens to forget to ask to see the cart, well that’s their purgative. Either way, you’ve got free drinking water for the next 7 days. That’s not stealing, that’s just employee negligence.

When you're thinking of a song, and then it's on the radio: We all have our favorite songs. You know, those songs that we’re always happy to hear come on the radio. But this occasion is even more special when you’re thinking about a song, say “Desperado,” and then you press ON and there it is… “DESPERAAAADOOOO.”
But it doesn't necissarily have to be your favorite song to be good. Sometimes you hear a song from a friend or heard one on the radio earlier, and all you can think of is four words of the song. What’s more, you have been singing those four words all day and humming out the rest of the melody. On top of that, because you don’t know the song, you are actually singing the WRONG lyrics, negating even the best Google search. But like a divine miracle, you turn on your car radio (because when else are you listening to the radio) and there it is, That Song! How HUGE is that? Now you’ll definitely remember enough to look up later, and you’ll realize the lyrics aren’t “…I’ve got all these up in my name,” they’re “I’ve got the visas in my name, if you come around here, I make ‘em all day.” Grand.

Getting the good seat: When you’re getting prepaid tickets and can pick a seat, this goes out the window*. But if you’re going to the movie theater and you get that epic seat in the middle just before the trailers start, that’s clutch. What about the Plane (well Southwest Airlines). Getting that aisle seat or more importantly, the seat in the emergency exit row, (Legroom galore) is definitely making your day.

*Unless you’ve paid for the seats behind the guy in the stovepipe hat.

Finding a random ball at the park: Want to know something true? Guys are like dogs in many ways. One such example is when we’re doing something at a park and we stumble upon a lost ball in the park. Jackpot! Like you’re not picking up that stray tennis ball? Pst, please. If you’re with others it’s a fight to see who gets it. And the guy who’s sitting there saying, “I’m too mature for that,” is inevitably the first one to ask if he can see it when you start bouncing that bad boy everywhere.

Putting clothes on straight from the dryer: You get back in the house from a cold day, or wake up on a cold morning and you need to change your clothes. Putting on clothes in general would be nice warmth in this occasion. Putting on clothes straight out of the dryer, you just made like all dogs and went to heaven. The best laundry garment are socks, though. Putting those toasty socks right up on your feet is absolutely terrific. Now that your toes are warm, your body now knows it’s okay to start getting the other extremities warmed up.

Winning a buck from $1 scratch-n-win: Occasionally when you get your gas, or pick up a few things at the convince store you tell the cashier to throw in a dollar scratch ticket. It’s a dollar, why not? You know you're not gonna win, but you buy it anyways. So you go back to your car and pull out the lucky penny and scratch off the silvery stuff and bam, you’ve won a dollar, but it’s not about winning that dollar, it’s the fact that you won! What a feeling! Inevitably, like a drug, you want to feel it again, so you buy another ticket instead of getting the dollar back, and lose, but really, what’d you expect? At that point you were playing with house money (even though you paid $1 already for the first ticket, so technically you’re playing with the original $1, but that’s just technicalities).

Unexpected leftovers: How many times a day do you open the fridge only to be met by the disappointment of nothing to eat. Well there is stuff to eat, the fridge is full, but there’s nothing you want to eat, that is, unless there are some leftovers in there. Leftovers that you know are there are always good, but when a roommate or family member stocks the fridge with leftovers, well then there is such a thing as a free lunch, and a damn tasty one at that. Now you’re only two-minutes away from delicious tastiness in your belly. And if one person in your home is a naysayer about leftovers, well my friend, you’re eating for two.

Hitting a tough shot into the garbage can: You lean back in your chair so you can get your arm and eyes in an angle to see the garbage/recycle bin 15-feet away around your cubicle. You know there’s a 1-in-10 shot you’re getting that empty Poland Spring bottle in there, but hey, you were going to get up and throw it out later anyway, so why not right? You arch your arm back, and the bottle goes end over end toward the bin. Suddenly there’s hope and as the bottle falls you realize it may actually go in, and your foresight is rewarded with the beautiful sound of the bottles clanking around as you’ve hit nothing but, er, box! You might as well be Michael Jordan at that point. If there was someone else around by the way, there’s only the same 1-in-10 chance they’re NOT trying the same shot which they’ll attempt until there’s nothing left to throw in the garbage. If they can’t do it in 8 tries, you feel like Superman. Correction: you ARE Superman.

Elevator button working immediately: I don’t know about you, but we think waiting sucks. We live in the fast-paced want it yesterday world where we are always moving and doing something, so waiting for an elevator is just impeding me from getting to the bottom floor, so I can sit on that sweet bench. But when you hit that button and the ‘ding!’ goes off right away, that’s like music to your ears. Who’s not waiting here? This guy.

Side Note: Like any button, tell me you’re actually pressing it once. There’s at least a double-press. If it’s not there within 15 seconds, it’s getting about 8 more presses, too. Same fast-button pressing applies to the crosswalk as well.

Someone calling and canceling when you didn’t want to do something anyway: So you were going to finally hang out with “Flakey Friend” (refer to previous blog about Flakey Friend for definition). Well, unbelievably, FF hasn’t cancelled, and now you’re bummed out, because now you’re getting prepped to see them. Worse yet, your other friends invited you somewhere better but your conscience has eaten you alive to hang with Flakey McFlakerston. This is suddenly when this douche calls you up, “Hey dude, I’m not feeling well…” or “I’m going to have to give you the rain check this week, sorry to do it for a 12th week in a row.” Your response: I understand, sorry it didn’t work out dude, I was so psyched.

Really, your response was something along the lines of: There is a god.

Thank goodness you have friends that are more willing to bail out on plans than you are, because right now, instead of getting a few pops and watching the game with your buddies, you would have been neck-deep in bullshit hanging out with that drain of a friend.

Waking up in the middle of the night thinking it’s time to get up, but really you have 4 more hours: Suddenly waking up in the middle of the night, what a rush, you automatically think you slept past your alarm and scramble for the clock, only to see that it’s only 3 a.m. and you have 4 more hours left to sleep. It’s not as good as getting a full night’s sleep, but it’s a little bit of “I’m sorry, false alarm” reward you get from your brain.

Prime time Parking Spot: Much like catching all of the lights, it never happens when you really need it, but once in a while you’ll take the risk and drive through that first row of parking spots and see that oasis in the parking lot desert, and save the extra 10 feet of walking. Even more key than this is if it’s a spot you can pull through so you don’t have to back out when you leave. Not only are you close, but now you’re pulling out of this lot like Batman, which is important, because who wants to have more time separating themselves from the movie theater to their TV?